HOW DOES IT TASTE?? I decided to start this blog because I've come to realization that so many people want to hear the reality of shit,but at the same time can't take it.So I'm here to belch some reality in the air and I hope you like the taste of it.What qualifies me to do this reality belching? Well my life does and pretty much because this is my blog I'm allowed to say whatever it is I feel is reality.If you don't like what I have to say that's cool,but I will make one promise to you and that's I'll keep it all the way funky. Since I don't know you all well enough yet,you can call me Lou. I'll be blogging about whatever it is that comes to my mind,current events,issues and things of that nature and from time to time I'll include a youtube or two.If you don't like abrasive language,which I may use quite often then I'll offer you this one apology because I will NOT be making anymore in the future. I APOLOGIZE FOR MY SOMETIMES ABRASIVE LANGUAGE AND THE STINCH OR AFTER TASTE OF THE BELCH OF REALITY I LEAVE ON EVERY BLOG.THIS BLOG IS NOT FOR THE UPTIGHT AND CLOSE MINDED,SO IF YOU QUALIFY AS EITHER OF THOSE I'D SUGGEST YOU KEEP PUMPING PASS THIS BLOG. Now that we've gotten the formalities out of the way let's get into it. FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER: @iBowTie YOUTUBE: DONTBAFRAID2THINKTV2 although I rarely blog at this point.
A Little Transparency
So i’ve been feeling so completely and utterly stressed and worried lately. I’ve had so many mini breakdowns the last month or so it’s ridiculous. I’ve been trying to figure out not the obvious normal things like finances or bills,but the deep rooted issues. I am consistently worried about my loved ones. Like are they okay,will they be okay,are they sick,are they gonna pass? and that sucks a bunch. I worry so much so that I get like almost zero sleep and if I do fall asleep the slightest sound will wake me and my mind starts running worrying about what just happened. I constantly text my mother if I’m not around her to make sure she’s eaten. If I’m going to hang out with someone and they’re running late I’m worried something happened to them. This is blowing my life!
I’ve been sharing my feelings with those closest to me and through talking to them it came to me that maybe I have a fear of losing those closest to me. I’ve lost so many people in my 31 years that it’s just crazy. Since the age of 12 I’ve lost at least two people a year. So you do that math. When someone passes I have this thing where I won’t/don’t/can’t look at any picture of them. I guess I figure if I don’t look then it won’t hurt. I think finally the hurt is catching up with me. I’m learning through self discovering and the aid of friends that I haven’t learned the clearly important skill of coping. Coping with the loss of loved ones, coping with people leaving me all alone, coping with stress. I just don’t know how and that worries me. So I’ve decided that maybe I need to talk to someone outside of my circle to shed new light on this situation cause I can’t keep having these little breakdowns. It’s not what’s up
Just wanted to put this in writing and get it off my chest for the night. So there’s my bit of transparency for a while.
